A Parrot, A Dog & A Cat.
A woman brings her parrot to the vet. The parrot is stiff and lifeless.
"I'm sorry ma'am, but this parrot is dead"
"How can you tell so quickly?" replies the woman, "Isn't there a way to be absolutely certain?"
So, the vet whistles and a beautiful black Labrador Retriever walks in the examining room. The Lab sniffs around the parrot for a few moments, then looks at the vet and, with sad eyes and shakes his head.
"A dog shakes its head and I'm supposed to believe that?!" cries the woman. "You're going to have to do more to prove that my poor parrot is dead!"
So the vet leaves momentarily, comes back with a cat and puts it on the table beside the parrot. The cat looks closely at the parrot, walks around it, prods it a bit, then shakes his head and jumps off the table.
Finally, the woman seems convinced. As she turns for the door, the vet announces that she owes him $700.
"$700?!," the woman asks. "How in the world could it be that much just to tell me my parrot is dead?"
"Well, it would have been a lot cheaper, but you insisted on a lab report and cat scan!"